Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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