We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
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