Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
