hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
