he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Alive.
So much puke
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
