I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
