their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
