I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
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