i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
