fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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