If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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