Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
