I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
That reminds me...we need to get swords
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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