Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
