you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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