good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
this boner is exhausting
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
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We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
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I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right