part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
