Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
