so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Ladies don't puke and tell
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
