We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
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