I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
