i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
