so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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