Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i dont even know how to be here
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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