you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Randomize
