Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
i think im in europe. pls send help
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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