covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
