Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
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