I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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