did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
My ATM looks so different sober.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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