I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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