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i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
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