Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Buhtt sex?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize