I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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