I would go down on you faster than GM stock
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
