i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize