If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
