trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
