I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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