he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
