lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He uses pillows to masturbate.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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