is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
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