i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize