She announced her abortion via fbk
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
