friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
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the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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