I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize