I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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