dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
false alarm. still invincible.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
