I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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