She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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