There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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